Offtopic: Joke: New Euro-English

2000-09-20 23:32:35

  Pido disculpas a aquel que o bien no le interese el mensaje, o bien no
entienda el inglés y de poco le sirva, pero es que Richard Foersom me ha
remitido este texto jocoso y es realmente bueno...

Can you speak the new Euro-English?

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English
will be the official language of the European Union rather than German,
which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in
plan that would be known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make
the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favor of
the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have one less

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
troublesome "ph" will be replased with the "f". This will make words like
fotograf 20% shorter!

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expected to
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments
will enkorage the removal of double leters which have always ben a deterent
to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "e"
in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
"z" and "w" wiz "v". During ze fifz year ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from
vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kurs be aplid to ozer
kombinations of leters. After ze fifz yer ve vil hav a rali sensibl ritn Nes
styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evriun vil find it ezi tu
undrstand ech ozer.

Zen Z Drem Vil Finali Kum Tru!!!

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